You’ve done what was needed, what was expected. You’ve been dependable, competent, strong.
And still — something’s not working.
You’ve held it together for years. Maybe decades.
Kept your cool, kept the peace, kept your worries to yourself.
Something is wearing you down. It’s not just pressure from outside; it’s something internal.
A knot you can’t untie. A restlessness. A sadness. A silence. A broken heart.
That’s often where counselling for men begins: not with collapse, but with the slow weight of all that holding.
Counselling doesn’t have to mean endless self-analysis or rehashing childhood stories.
For many men, it’s about having one space where you don’t have to keep it together. Where it’s possible to name what’s been silent for years — and to begin working with it.
Whether you’re navigating a major life shift or slowly burning out under the surface, this is a place for straight-talking, focused work — in English, and grounded in what matters most to you.
And for many men, this isn’t an easy step
I’ve been there.
Going on for years and years, grinding my teeth, soldiering on. “I don’t need help – who are they to think they know better?”
Writing that email to a therapist a friend told you about, or making that call might be too tough an act.
Not because it’s weak.
But because it’s unfamiliar.
Talking to someone — without fixing, without problem-solving, without turning it into a joke or a plan — can feel like stepping off a ledge with no training.
Some part of you might think: “This is self-indulgent,” or “It won’t change anything.” Or you’re not even sure what you’d say. Maybe you’re worried you’ll fall apart. Or worse — that you won’t feel anything at all.
That’s the bind: stay silent and keep the lid on, or open up and risk being seen.
But real therapy for men isn’t about exposing yourself. It’s about building enough trust to stop pretending. About making space for the parts of you that don’t get much airtime. If you’ve never done this before, hesitation makes sense. It’s not a flaw. It’s protection.
The question is: does that protection still serve you — or has it started costing too much?
And – full transparency: Growth can mean stepping into unfamiliar territory, and that might not be easy. Growing as a person doesn’t only mean “gaining”, it also means letting go.
That’s the bind: stay silent and keep the lid on, or open up and risk being seen
That’s the bind: stay silent and keep the lid on, or open up and risk being seen
What brings men to counselling
Each man has his own story, his own struggle, his own dilemma. His own joys, sense of purpose, his own dreams. His own loves for family, friends, activities…
The themes they bring to counselling vary wide. You can read more here about some of them like how men process loss and grief, or the pressure to perform, how they navigate shame, or how they are learning to feel again.
Some other topics include:
- Emotional burnout, numbness, or shutdown
- Anger, or irritability
- Isolation, loneliness, disconnection
- Fatherhood, divorce, career shifts, questions of identity
- Relationships that feel strained, distant, or stuck
- Not knowing who you are anymore — or never quite having known
“I had trouble enjoying life and that scared me for my future. Thanks to Aernout I’ve been able to transform my wounds and fears into self-curiosity. He has helped me zoom out and finally appreciate myself as a normal human being instead of the poor protagonist trapped inside his own story.”
— Male client, 2025
What working together looks like
This isn’t performance coaching. It’s not about becoming “better.” It’s about becoming more true. I wrote more about what this kind of healing can look like in The Magic of Counselling.
These are the conversations that respect your intelligence, your depth, your scepticism. There’s no fixing.
No “how does that make you feel” ritual.
Just honest, grounded engagement — towards clarity, presence, and a sense of self that doesn’t always need to perform. This is counselling that finds out who you are, deep down, and how you can bring that presence forward in the things you do, and to the people you love.
This work is engaged, directive, and grounded in two things: truth and relationship — drawing on approaches like Relational Life Therapy, developed by therapist and author Terry Real.
We can make our time together as practical and solution-oriented as you need it to be, or go as deep as you want us to go.
Your choice.
Your life.
If this resonates, let’s talk
There doesn’t have to be a crisis. You don’t have to hit a wall before something changes. But if you’re carrying too much — or feeling too little — this might be the right time to reach out.
I work online with men across Switzerland — including smaller towns and rural areas.
If speaking in your own language matters, you don’t have to translate yourself here.
Themes in Therapy & Counselling >
Readings:
Also looking for help as a partner or parent? Explore: Couples Counselling of Individual Counselling.
Frequently Asked Questions
Why do some men avoid counselling?
Because they’ve been taught to fix things alone, or feel weak if they need help. But facing your inner world — especially the parts you hide — takes strength, not weakness.
Do I have to talk about my childhood?
Only if it helps. We’re not digging through your past for the sake of it. But if something early shaped how you show up now — in relationships, with anger, or around trust — we might go there. Briefly. With purpose.
Can I do men’s counselling online? I travel or live remotely.
Yes — I work with men across Switzerland and internationally via Zoom. The work is flexible, private, and real — wherever you are.
What kinds of things do men bring to counselling?
Relationship issues. Emotional shutdown. Porn or sex struggles. Work pressure. Anger that leaks out sideways. Or just the sense that you're performing life instead of living it.
Do I need to talk about feelings?
Not in a “touchy-feely” way. But if something’s off — anger, withdrawal, numbness — feelings are already running the show. This is about naming what’s real so you’re not ruled by it.
I want to fix my relationship — can I do that alone, or do we need couples counselling?
You can absolutely start alone. Relationships are systems — when one part shifts, the whole can change. You’ll learn to speak differently, show up differently, and stop fuelling the same fights. Sometimes your partner joins later. Sometimes they don’t. But the work still matters.
